Song: Cover of Better Days by The Walls Group
Have you ever had those days where you simply don’t have any more push through? I had that day yesterday; anything became too much.
I found myself crying real tears over little things. I left the hospital Sunday with 4 tubes hanging out of me. I think at least 2 of them started leaking and I couldn’t figure out where or why. If I thought there was a more potent word than tired, I would use it. Every movement seem to tap into the depleted wells of my energy.
So I cried and sobbed until I started talking to God aloud. God, this is too much. God, I’m tired of pain and being tired. God, what’s the point? God, I don’t want to ask for help, I just want someone to see and help while I grapple with my pride. God, what if tomorrow’s appointment doesn’t go well? ETC…..
When I had exhausted my feelings I realized that January 9, 2018 makes 15 years since my mom died. Sometimes I forget what she looked like until I look in the mirror. I find great comfort in music and I’m really careful about what I listen to because sometimes lyrics are easier to recall than scriptures. So a song came on and something caused me to really listen to the words:
🎼makes no difference, what’s the problem, I can go to God in prayer!🎼
Peace descended, tears dried up and a flood of gratitude covered me.
Thank you God